One of the things that absolutely makes me CrAzY is an incompetent therapist. I have worked with many in my day and so I thought it might be an important thing to talk with you about. Many people have gone to therapy and had a very bad experience - and never went back. What constitutes a bad experience? You get to decide if the therapist is a good fit. One of the best ways to find a good therapist is to ask others for a recommendation. Word of mouth advertising is the best especially if you trust the person you are asking.

Here is what you should expect:

• introduction of therapy process
• confidentiality and the limits of confidentiality
• safety reporting and procedure
• identification of therapy style
• what to expect
• building rapport with each other
• creating a plan together
• working the plan
• what to do if there is a conflict
• building a plan for your future

I recommend you TRUST yourself. If you don't feel it is a good fit, talk about that with the therapist. I believe in giving things a chance but typically in the first few sessions you should know.

• If you dread appointments, you should ask for a change.
• Evaluate your motive - if you are leaving a therapist because they don't always agree with you - think about that - your life is in a mess and agreeing with you may keep it there.
• If you don't feel heard or important - it might be good to say that out loud. If you can work on movement that feels right - pursue it.
• If the therapist sits and says nothing - you could have gotten that anywhere and should consider spending your money elsewhere
• If the therapist doesn't help you feel stronger and more in control - you are moving in the wrong direction
• If the therapist has you coming back weekly for years - you might have wasted your money

As a therapist, I believe my job is to put myself out of work. If your therapist is not working for the same - check your resources.